• It is normal, even for Christian men and women faithful to their spouses, to feel attracted to attractive members of the opposite sex. Unmet emotional needs tend to multiply this chemistry.

• When a pastor finds himself attracted to a parishioner, it is his responsibility as a professional caregiver to recognize the danger and use his leadership responsibility to prevent the relationship from becoming romanticized.

• Some predatory pastors are so corrupt as to be strategically and compulsively abusive, but many fine pastors become sexually abusive simply because they allow their love for God and their spouses to become less important than their ministry to church members.

• Paradoxically, victims of abuse often take much or most of the blame and shame upon themselves after being drawn into inappropriate sexuality.
  

• The more likable and admirable a pastor is, the more a victim of his sexual abuse may suffer shame and guilt (particularly if she has had a good marriage). This also is true at the opposite extreme: the more deceptive and manipulative a career predator is, the more likely his victim may suffer increased shame and guilt—the most clever abusers manage to download all blame to the victim.

• Adult victims of clergy sexual abuse need not prove to anyone, even to themselves or to God, that they are totally innocent—all human beings are sinners in need of Christ’s saving grace.

• Church leaders and other members typically rally around a popular pastor, despite credible evidence that he is guilty of sexual abuse. The church would rather blame his victim than lose a beloved spiritual leader.

• In the aftermath of clergy sexual abuse, most efforts to aid recovery are devoted toward the abuser and his spouse rather than to the victim, who often is abandoned or even expelled from the community of believers. 

In such cases, The Hope of Survivors often becomes the only hope of surviving clergy sexual abuse.